Someone in adcom has been drinking lately...
Friday, February 16, 2007
...because they gave me interviews at Ross and Wharton. Kellogg, Ross and Wharton. Hahaha. Global warming must be affecting hell right now too.
Interviewing is always an interesting experience. When I go to meet my interviewer, I always hope that I'm about to be interviewed by someone who does crack, because the straight-forward interviews are so boring. I want someone to ask me some off the wall questions that really make me think. We all expect the standard fare, so when you ask us a run-of-the-mill question, you're just getting a practiced and recited answer. Here's a rundown of the common (read: boring) questions.
Question: Why an MBA?
What We Say: I feel that an MBA is a logical progression for my professional development. I am learning more than my fair share of skills in my current job, but unfortunately my areas of refinement are at the mercy of what work is readily available. However, by getting an MBA I have the ability to focus my efforts in improving myself in areas I truly want to get into.
What We Mean: I fucking hate my job.
Question: Why now?
What We Say: Being recently promoted, I think that this would be a beneficial time to take a natural break from working and get back into the classroom to recharge myself. I have lofty goals and I could spend years flailing around looking for ways to get there, or I could go to a place that will immediately direct me towards my future.
What We Mean: Because if I have to spend another year doing this shit, I will put a bullet in my pancreas, as a slow and painful death would help me forget how miserable my job makes me feel.
Question: Why this school?
What We Say: When I stepped onto this campus, it just felt right. There's something about the aura that surrounds the students here that makes it feel like home, and I couldn't appreciate that more. That alone tells me there is no other place I'd rather be, but in addition, academically, this school has by far the best opportunities for and the (whatever) department is bar-none the finest in the nation, nay, the world.
What We Mean: Would you rather me recite the shit I memorized from the website or the viewbook?
Question: What would you do after you get your MBA?
What We Say: Where do I start? (laughter) I really love the idea of helping people, and I don't think you have to relegate yourself to a life of sacrifice as a pauper to do so. Immediately after school, I want to get involved with business development in under-developed areas, but my ultimate goal is to open a consulting firm that specializes in helping under-represented minorities gain venture capital to start small businesses.
What We Mean: If you'd guarantee me a quarter million dollar salary, I'd kill babies and wear them as gloves.
Question: What is your biggest flaw?
What We Say: I think that I care too much. Sometimes I just get so passionate about what I do at work that it starts to affect other aspects of my life. Problems that arise at work can make me lose sleep or cause me to become distracted when I'm at home. However, this "flaw" also allows me to immerse myself in whatever I do and continuously perform at a very high level.
What We Mean: Are you kidding me? I'm perfect. They modeled Jesus Christ after me. Well, I guess if I HAD to pick something, I guess it would be that I don't tell people I have herpes until after we bang. But, that's not really a flaw.
posted by mbahunt @ 12:33 AM,
1 Comments:
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At 8:06 PM,
said...
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This blog site is pure comedic genius... Please write a book and I'll buy it.